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Sweet Sister Mercy

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I'm So Hip

I may have many pair of shoes, but I only have one pair of sneakers. I'm probably afraid to appear too sporty or something. However, sneakers are my default shoes once the weather (or my office) is too cold for sandals. I have cute flats, low heel pumps, and even a pair of Doc Martens Mary Janes that I can walk comfortably in all day long, but I still wear sneakers most of the time.

Yes, I also have a few pairs of not-so-comfortable heels, some boots, and three pairs of dance shoes. Thanks for asking.

Anyway, my only sneakers, a cute pair of purple Converse Grimes, were dying. Nothing surprising, really, as I've had them for over a year and that's how long Converses usually last me. So I went and perused several shoes websites, and was attracted by a dark red pair. I clicked on them and decided they were exactly what I wanted.

Cute Shoes!

And that's when I realized they were actually sustainable and eco-friendly. And promising me to get in touch with my inner hippie. I didn't even know I had an inner hippie, so imagine my surprise.

These shoes have a silk top, which means that I won't be able to wet them, which shouldn't be too much of a problem except maybe for crossing through freshly watered lawns, and are otherwise made of organic cotton, recycled car tire, post-consumer paper pulp, and vulcanized rubber, whatever the hell that is (okay, fine, the cross-linking of rubber by addition of sulfur under heat, if you really want to know). The laces are made out of recycled soda bottles. Fan-ceh.

But anyway, they were cute.

So I bought them. And received them promptly. And tried them on. Only to realize that they really make me look like I have the tiniest little feet.

Tiny Footsies

But still, cute new shoes.

Squeeeee!

Friday 9 October 2009
21:12
in Sweet Sister Mercy

Good Day To YOU, Sir.

Good day

My name is Richard Tang, from hong Kong. I have a business transaction that would benefit us.

This project has to do with funds transaction and investment. Please write to my private e-mail richardtang177@yahoo.com.hk to enable me provide you with details on what I propose. Thanks.

Mr. Richard Tang

Besides proper use of grammar and spelling, could you be any less specific, if it's not too much to ask? I'm afraid you let out too much information in this email and you never know who snoops on your inbox. Well, I'm ready to let that slip for once, because this new email address seems so much more secure than the one you sent the message from, kerkhoff35@hetnet.nl.

Dude.

People seriously take the time to reply to that kind of message?

(No need to point out people seriously take the time to read them and comment them on their blog. Procrastination has nothing to do with willfully setting oneself for a rip-off.)

Tuesday 4 August 2009
10:00
in Sweet Sister Mercy

The Many Joys of Public Laundry Rooms

Dear Launderette Serial Flirters,

I have had a long day. I am tired. I am sweaty. I am doing laundry, or reading my book waiting for laundry to be done. Chances are I am not very receptive to your hitting on me.

True, I am never very receptive to complete strangers hitting on me. Please complain to the multiple guys who thought that my politely answering meant I was totally digging them. It makes you wary, after a while. And if I've never met you before you came up to me to tell me I have beautiful eyes, the chances that I dig you are slim. Very slim. Between naught and nonexistent, I'd say. (Especially, although that does not apply to doing laundry in the evening but has been known to happen before, if I am wearing shades. I mean, you're right, I do have beautiful eyes hidden behind the dark lenses, but I'm just not that into diviners. They give me the creeps.)

But even if I was into being hit on at random by complete strangers, I don't think that asking me for change would be the best route. I make sure to ask for change in the right denominations at the store and to keep the precious coins aside. And if I don't have enough, I go buy a bottle of water or a journal or something at a nearby shop rather than bother people who probably need their spare ones and fives as much as I do. So, well, it makes you look a bit irresponsible, especially if you let me know that you've used this laundromat many times before. And if turns out afterwards that you actually had enough coins, I'm not going to be flattered. I'm going to be pissed.

That said, your best chance to irk me is to ask me at what temperature to wash each piece of clothing. Because you see, I doubt that being a female makes me any more qualified than you to read the freaking label. And if by the age of thirty you haven't figured out how to wash your clothes on your own, be assured that I have no intention whatsoever to be the sweet chick who'll do it for you. You might want to go look up "independence" in the dictionary, too.

Also, I kinda hope you choke. K².

4 witty thoughts no trackback

Monday 27 July 2009
11:32
in Sweet Sister Mercy

page 2 of 2 -

At the Moment

I read

Novels by Ross Macdonald, Len Deighton, and Elmore Leonard (but not all at the same time).

I listen to

Minor Majority, Of Montreal, Porkupine Tree, Angelfish, Léo Ferré, The Nationals, Sarah Vaughan, The Ditty Bops, Absynthe Minded, Mozart, Stamitz, Bill Evans.

I am

busy, busy, busy, oh, and did I mention busy, delighted by Oscar Wilde (One should always be a little improbable), a little improbable, still very much of a bloody leftist, heathen atheist, and a woman scientist.

Deep Thought

'To leave is to die a little. But to die is to leave a lot' (translated from French)
[Alphonse Allais]

(Almost) Legal Mentions

(Dammit this one joke only works in French. You're missing out.)
Not recommended for children under 36 months.
Please handle carefully.
Ask your pharmacist.
Suitable for infant feeding.
Consumption of alcoholic beverages impairs your ability to drive a car or operate machinery, and may cause health problems.
Beware of the kitty.
Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear.
By the way, smoking kills.*
 
* Strike out if inapplicable


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